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juliedodd0

Decisions decisions

Went over to the studio today. Got some stuff done, but mainly chatted. Not really what I should be doing when I need to create the same again in installation pieces!!! Brought everything home so I’ll just work all evening on it.

Need to get a statement written for the weekend, glad I’ve been working on it for a few days now, but do need to come to some decisions.

Other stuff I’ve been thinking about today:

Whilst making the pieces for ‘Inner Beauty’ unexpected things have led me in other directions. I’ve been talking about how I’m not sure how much the fashion/glamour and modelling industries are now influencing my thoughts on my work but also there was another unexpected feeling I got whilst making this work, how I felt about handling second hand magazines, I am terrible about touching things that other people have handled and especially struggled with the magazines from car boot sales that really revolted me but which are now transformed into beautiful things. Funnily I don’t like handling the magazines, they feel dirty to me but when they become ‘inner beauty’ pieces I can handle them fine, it’s almost like they where never magazines. But this doesn’t have any relevance to why I created it so doesn’t need to be mentioned just like I don’t think I need to discuss how I feel about the modelling industry etc. (I think)

Pam has asked me if I want to give an Artists Talk. I initially felt panicked, but I do want to do it. I want to be able to stand and talk about my work, I just know I’m rubbish at it. I haven’t given an answer yet though, I’ll write down some ideas and see if I can advance on it further. I keep thinking that if I want to be seen as a professional artist any day soon I should be doing it. Shouldn’t I be able to just take it in my stride though? Oh I feel sick now! I was rubbish at it when I was doing my degree but got better as time went on because I was doing it all the time, although I’d say it isn’t something that’ll even come easy to me, no matter how much I did it, but I’m out of practice now. The problem is I don’t talk to anyone usually about my work anymore. That’s one of the main reasons I really wanted this resdiency, I really miss being part of something since my fellowship finished. It’s hard to be motivated on your own and I’m never sure I’m going in the right direction or that others will get what I’m doing. Or if it’s even worth doing!

Anyway I’ll casually say, if I structure what I want to say it’ll be ok. I’m sure I won’t feel like that when I start writing stuff down though!

I took in some pieces of work to be considered for an art auction in elevator cafe next Friday night today. I took a couple of ‘paper eggs’ and some ‘Pores for Thought’ pieces. Embarrassing if my piece doesn’t get any bids though. I was going to go for the evening but I’m not sure I want to now… Oh, I take myself far to seriously sometimes, I need to lighten up, who cares if it doesn’t get any? Anyway it’ll be the perfect opportunity to get to know the arena artists better and it looks like it’ll be a really fun evening. And its pizza and cocktail night, yay.

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